Saturday, April 25, 2015

Signs You Have Teenagers

10) Your taste in music is curiously updated but you can't acknowledge it publicly.

9) You have an Instagram, Twitter and Tumblr feed.  You only use them to see what's going on with your children. You don't think they know.

8) You worry there is some new equivalent of Twitter, Tumblr and Facebook that only teens known about. If they know you teen-cyberstalk.

7) On occasion, the teen will suggest, you borrow from her wardrobe or that you need to go shopping.

6) If they have lots of friends, you worry who are they and why do they like my child?  If they don't have lots of friends, you worry, why not? Why don't they like my child? What's wrong with them?  

5) When the teen texts you asking for a run to Starbucks. You bring an ice coffee even though you don't drink Starbucks.  On occasion, when the teen says I could use a protein shake, you bring a protein shake, and when you stop for gas and lament "We're out of diet coke."  Someone runs into the station, and with their own money, brings you back a diet coke.

4) Your experience as a teen, as an adult, your educational background, your years as a parent, your knowledge base, all count for squat.  

3) The surest root to silence is an attempt to have a conversation.

2) The surest root to a conversation is to plan for silence. (like reading a book, planning to take a bath or a nap).

1) On Twitter you find a "Thanks Mom."  with a photo of the ice coffee.  They know.


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Leaving a comment is a form of free tipping. But this lets me purchase diet coke and chocolate.

If you sneak my work, No Chocolate for You!